I Would Set You On Fire

does my self-righteous anger piss you off?

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I hope it does.

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I hope it burns and reminds you of your flaws and shortcomings. I hope everything reminds you of me and eats you up alive with all-consuming rage, burns you up like a fire that cannot be put out. I hope your candles fall and catch fire to the letters I wrote you. I hope it spreads to your bed which I laid in and the stuffies I gave you who didn’t deserve abandonment. I hope it surrounds you until there is nowhere you can turn without seeing the ash and soot, the messiness that follows me, that I trail over your carpets.

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you liked to sing in the car, and I remember I’d cry, the lyrics so hopeless, so cold and bitter. then you went back on all your promises and I found those words full of anger, rich with spice and sharp edges, a burn that doesn’t go away. I scream them to the dying stars, scream them to the sky and pray for fire to fall on your head.

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you wonder why I am angry, and I wonder why you ask. you broke down the walls of my home, and you have the nerve left for confusion. I hold matches to your neck the way you hold boxcutters to mine. you cracked every vase I gave you, every flower shredded, every ounce of my heart in bloody scraps under the bed to be fed to your dog.

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and even your dog would not eat them.

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and I still stand here unbeating, fire in my guts and fire to the trees.

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and you are unafraid, smiling back at me.